Weekly

2000.05.21.06.53 (Sunday)
0017 - Falling Down / Storm Warning. Take your pick ^_^


Hey kids.

Everyone's leaving! Colin got expelled (after his knife wielding exploits). Shohan left (albeit to return next year). Michael left (to go fight Aliens and Predators [or become a Marine]). All the Year 11s left. All the Year 13s left. It's just like all those years ago, when everyone, um, left. Though now the Year 13s have left it feels muy funky. You know how even if you don't know everyone in your year you recognise faces and maybe know a lot of people's names? (Well, if you've been at a school for five years already, anyway.) So I kinda recognised most everyone in Year 13. But Year 12? Who the smeg are all these people?! So I'm feeling all lonesome. Aww. No, seriously, it's weird. Over 1000 people in the school. And I know (as in vaguely-recognise-who-the-hell-they-are. Not even know or anything silly like that.) maybe 50 of them? If that? Not right.

Bad stuff has happened.

So big change there then ^_^

For those of you I haven't got round to telling, it turns out I'm short-sighted as well (this is not the bad stuff). First astigmatism, then RP now this. It's groovy I tells ya. Anyhew (fuchsia) this means I get to wear glasses again (after not for nearly two years [did between ages of seven and sixteen]). Which I'll be getting in a few days or so. Happy Daze.

Stuff has been done. Results were far from desirable (this is not the bad stuff either). Yet it's still good, it's still good! I guess. 'Cos now I can think of other stuff. Yippee.

Subtlety sucks. It messes with my head. Say what you mean and mean what you say (am I quoting anybody here?).

Turns out people (well, adults. Not really people as such but... wait a corn picking minute. 53 days! Eek!) think I'm rude. Because I don't talk lots. I haven't talked lots in a while now. I have nothing important to say. Or even funny for that matter. Time was I could judge just what to say, and just when to say it, to make people laugh quite a lot. In recent times I have tried to recapture those days of yore. And have been stared at blankly for the most part. So I say less. Nothing funny to say. Nothing important. Why waste breath? (This isn't the bad stuff either.)

Anyway. Shohan sent out a questionnaire a long time ago (Bad stuff? Nope.). And, being in possession of ample time to waste, I actually bothered to fill it in and send it back to him. Recently, however, there has been a spurt of mass e-mails featuring the aforementioned questionnaire. So let's go in for some of that repeating junk. Though only Shohan will have read this anyway... So it's been updated as well ^_^ New comments too!

~

Name:    Caleb Newcastle
Age:    17
Height:    5' 9"
Shoe Size:    7 or 8 or 9 or 10 or 11
*Are your biological parents together:    Yup
*Address:    England

(*Optional)

Music

What type of music are you interested in?
- Stuff which I like the sound of. Which at the moment is junk from the likes of Nerf Herders, Muse, The Pixies, Lit and Foo Fighters.

Other than just liking the music type, is there any other reason that you listen to this genre?
- No deep and meaningful reasons. Sorry ^_^

Do you think that your music choice controls your life in any way?
- Hell no. After I listen to it I feel all motivated and junk but then I just forget about it and carry on as usual.
- And now the answer's yes. Not controls as such, but New Way Home, by the Foo Fighters, gave me a much needed push to do something I needed to do.

Do you often get teased for your music tastes?
- My sister doesn't like Queen (who I also really like) but that's about it.
- Often being the operative word? No.

Do you think you are a well behaved person?
- Yup. I am a gentleman. When I can be arsed. Which, to be honest, is very rarely...

Do you think that your actions are infulenced by the music you listen to?
- Nope. Wish it was, 'cos I listen to damn fine songs.
- Now yup. See three questions up.

Has music ever helped you guide yourself though situations?
- Nope
- Yup

Does music help you to concentrate?
- Nope. And if it's a song I really like then it distracts me.

Do you work better while listening to music?
- Nope

Do you hate people with different music tastes? If so why?
- Nope. Though I dislike it when they play it really loud on their headphones when I'm in the room...

Why do you think that there are separations between music tastes?
- 'Cos humans dig dividing themselves over anything they can.

Do you think that the agressions between Greebos and Trendies is down to the music they listen to, or is it deeper than that? Or is it just an excuse?
- I don't even know what Greebos are. But I think it's probably just an excuse.
- So now I do know what Greebos are. Still an excuse.

Marilyn Manson

What do you think of this guy?
- He can look very pretty though he often doesn't.

Do You Like Him Or Not? Why?
- Don't enjoy his music. Don't know him beyond that.

Do you believe that he influenced the masacre?
- Nope. That's just sick weirdoes having fun.

*Do you know his real name?
- Nope

If you met him, honestly, what would you say to him?
- Nope

Do you think that he is a Bad influence?
- Nope

Do you believe that Marilyn Manson is just an act?
- Yup. The dude's a genius, making loads of money whilst he can. Respect.

Love

Have you ever exprienced love?
- Nope

~
Do you know what Love is?
- Not really. It's kinda a feeling.

Is it alright to Love a friend?
- Nope

*Can u love someone of the same sex, but not fancy them?
- Probably

*Do you think that love can be mistaken for obsession?
- Yup

Have you ever loved someone and not told them?
- Having not loved anyone, nope.

Has someone told you that they loved you, but you didn't feel the same?
- Yup

Do you think that Love is best left until you are older, as you can't marry below 16 years of age?
- Depends on the person. Some people are ready for love when they're like 14. I still don't know how to deal with it and I'm 17. I do believe in marriage, but it's kind of a vague belief.

*Have you ever thought that you loved someone of the same sex before, but found that it wasn't love, but a deep like?
- Nope

Friendship

To you, what is a definition of a friend?
- Someone who you like and who likes you.

Do you have a best friend?
- Nope

Are there things that you wouldn't tell your best friend?
- Not having one makes that hella easy. So yup.

*Do you tell your best friend more then you tell your family? If you do, do you think that is a good thing?
- I tell total strangers more than I tell my family. I don't want to burden them is the reason behind it. They've got too much to deal with my sisters and their lives and junk and I don't want to be a burden.

Have you ever felt used, by a friend?
- Yup

Has a friend ever lied to you?
- Yup

Have you ever broken up with a friend and regreted it?
- Broken up? Yup. Regretted it? Not really.

Have you ever lost contact with a friend and regretted it?
- Lost contact? Yup. Regretted it? Not when I think about it.

Beliefs

*Are you a part of a religion?
- Nope

*Do you think that religion is a good thing?
- Nope

Do you believe in God?
- Well, I've been reading Preacher recently... so yeah. But he's quit.

Do you believe in angels or ghosts?
- Again, because of the Preacher, yup for angels. But not ghosts.

Do you believe in Magic?
- Yup

Do you believe in Palmistry?
- Nope

Do you believe in Life after Death?
- Nope. All there is after death is death.

*I believe that everone has a purpose in life, what would you like yours to be?
- To find out what my purpose in life is. Nah, not really ^_^ I'd like my purpose in life to be to sleep. Forever. Never have to wake up.

Do you pray?
- Nope

Stuff in General

Do you know who I am? (Kage, better know as Shohan)?
- Yup

Do You like me?
- Kinda

*Why?
- You're kewl enough, but (i) I don't know you that well and (ii) you can be kinda annoying, with the singing and junk.

Do you think that I'm a show-off?
- Yup. Don't know why you are but you definitely are.

Without being silly; how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
- About a handful

Do you think that farting and burping is rude, seeing as it is natural?
- If you do it deliberately, and make a point of drawing people's attention to it, then yes. If you have no control over it, then no.

Do you think that smoking is really annoying?
- Yup. I think it looks kewl (in films etc.) but whenever I'm in an enclosed space with it, or near someone who's just been smoking, it makes me feel really ill and gives me a sore throat.

Does English weather get you really depressed?
- Nope. I like it.
- Except this new fangled hot and humid crap that's going on right now. Stinky poo.

*Have you ever wanted to just end it all?
- Yup. First I want to kill myself. Then I want to kill whoever it is that has made me feel this way in the first place. Then I just want to kill everyone else. Then I sleep and generally wake up okay.

*I believe that life is a challenge, and that if I end it myself I'm cheating myself. Is there something that keeps you going?
- Only that I don't want to be a burden on my family. If I killed myself I think it would screw up life for my sisters and parents. So I'll wait until I'm enough of a burden on them already (when I have to rely on them to get by / around etc.) before I end it. That way it'll be kinder for everyone.

What would you like to be in the future?
- Dead

What is your Number 1 ambition?
- To leave a legacy

Would you like to have a family in the future?
- Yup. But nope. I want a family, but I'll be blind, so I don't. 'Cos it would really suck not being able to see your wife and children. Though it turns out the chances of me passing on RP to my kids are ickle, 'cos it was a latent thang. Joy.

*What's the most rebelious thing you've done?
- Yup

*Have you ever disrepected an Adult? Did you regret it?
- Hell yeah. Only when it was someone I cared about.

~

That must have been so boring to read.

I was going to describe a dream I had but I shall not due to the immense cringe attack I suffered reading Drinkwater's last one. It just ain't fair to impose that level of cringinity on people. My dreams didn't do that to you, did they?

So I'll just tell you the gist of it. I'm not confident because my parents have undermined me my whole life. Have they? Who knows. 'Twas only a dream ^_^ (still not the bad stuff.)

I thank the Drinkwater for his change to the Verdana. Here, both for he and those others of you who wish to create your own stationary, is the code required to set the base font attributes. Hell, I'll be extra kind and give you the whole code I have going on in the style tag of my stationary ^_^

<style type="text/css">
  <!--
    body {font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;}
    a {text-decoration: none;}
    a:hover {background-color: #FF4400; color: #FFFFFF;}
  //-->
</style>

So don't rip that off, y'ken? Just copy and edit what you need. Don't want all our e-mails looking the same now...

Later,
Caleb

PS - Go check out my newly spruced up company site at www.megasad.freeserve.co.uk/megasad/docs/index.htm. There're all new pictures and a nice shiny new image array system. Don't know what I'm gibbering about? Go and see!

PPS - The bad stuff? Screw you.



jack.mp3