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Did I ever mention that I have a job? It is by no means a glamorous or particularly well-paid one, but it does fulfil its purpose - so that I can earn some money. Whenever I think about my job, a quote from one of my favourite films ('Clerks' by Kevin Smith, incidentally) springs to mind:
"This job would be great if it wasn't for the f**king customers!"
Kevin Smith is obviously very experienced in the working- in-a-shop-and-hating-it-but-nevertheless-tolerating-it- because-of-evil-capitalist-inclinations department.
Anyway, I work in a shop. My working time consists mainly of my selling reading material. A particularly popular range is rather dodgy "erotic" fiction and/or porn. I often question what I actually contribute to society, or to the general advancement of the human race, when the only time I serve the public is to sell pornography to middle-age, balding, suit-cladded, mobile-phone owning twats with leather briefcases. Or, known affectionately to my friend Cindy, as "wanker bankers". A very appropriate term, if I may say so myself.
What makes the situation even worse, or more amusing, depending on how you wish to view it, is when these men appear to be genuinely embarrassed about their purchases. They bring the aforementioned high quality periodicals to the till faced down (presumably so as not to corrupt the mind of the young, innocent shop assistant. How considerate!)
Not only do they bring the porn faced down to the tills, they often also place considerably more respectable reading items over those. Sometimes, they even try to draw attention away from their less than reputable purchases by engaging in conversations with the shop assistant (i.e. me).
I have always considered myself to be a liberal at heart, and although I personally disagree with pornography on principle, I would never prevent others from buying or reading it, nor would I attempt to censor it.
However, I do have a problem with people who are embarrassed about what they buy. If they are so ashamed of what they buy, then why buy it themselves, if at all?!
On the same subject of work, a few weeks ago, I had the weirdest (in the literal sense) working day that I have ever had. I counted no less than eleven weird people/incidents that happened during the six hours that I worked. To avoid boring my readers, I shall simply list them below with vague descriptions, so you'll get the general gist of the weirdness.
#1: Scary man who took (literally) half an hour to pay for the things he was buying, fumbling suspiciously in his pockets; taking ALL his money out of his pockets, putting them on the counter and then putting them all back in his pockets again... AND simultaneously frothing at the mouth and drooling...
#2: Woman who complained loudly and rudely about FREE body lotion smelling awful... but nonetheless taking a bottle anyway...
#3: Kid who nearly broke my till by hitting and banging the buttons on my keyboard...
#4: Man who stole a newspaper (of all things) and when forced by the security guards to pay for it, didn't even bother to take it with him...
#5: Man who asked if we sold razors - as you do in all bookshops...
#6: Woman who just randomly settled comfortably on a chair behind the till for ages...
#7: Kid who fell all over the place, knocking over barriers, dropping stuff that he bought and demonstrated to me very clearly that he indeed had his own bag...
#8: Evil guy who short-changed one of my colleagues...
#9: Man who asked me to give him five pounds...
#10: Man who thought that because he didn't have any money on him that he didn't have to pay for goods he wanted to buy...
#11: Nun who yelled at me and then gave me a five-minute lecture because I didn't have any stamps... Bitch.
Anyway, until next time, this is Jenny Leung signing out. Now back to the studio...
"When you kill people, they die!"
-Trailer for the film 'Anti-Trust'
[whoa! What a major revelation!]
A cool column for you all to visit:
http://www.soulinabox.com/th_index.htm
(He would like feedback.)
Postscript:
www.megasad.co.uk no longer contains a site. 'I'm not trying to write anything good' now resides at:
http://www.geocities.com/jenny_ht_leung/
(Press CTRL+D and bookmark it!)
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